The one thing humans are best at is packaging their own problems as others' problems. As long as they can blame others, there's no need to reflect on themselves. As long as they can throw out their emotions, there's no need to take responsibility. But reality is cruel. The more you are repeatedly hit by the same type of person, the more it shows that you are still stuck in the same structure. So you'll find that for the same issue, some people can easily move on, while others can't get past it in their entire lives. The difference isn't in the matter itself, but in whether there is a part of that person that they never dare to touch. True growth isn't about becoming better at reasoning, but about realizing that emotions are not used to prove others have problems, but to expose where you are still unstable.